Testimonials

Reba is one of the best editors I have worked with. Her work is thorough, reliable and efficient. She is always a pleasure to work with. I would recommend her to even the pickiest of authors.

– Lora Gallagher, Production Manager Outskirts Press

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COMMA SPLICING AND RUN-ON SENTENCES

One of the most common errors I see in manuscripts is comma splicing (also called run-on sentences)—a grammatical no-no. Comma splicing is the use of a comma to join two independent, complete sentences that can stand on their own. (I wrote a sentence, I used a comma...

The Realities Of Freelancing: Is It The “Free” Or The “Lance”?

Many people go into freelance work with wide-eyed optimism. Freelancing. Emphasis on the free. They imagine the freedom of setting their own hours, grabbing the laptop and jaunting off to work in a trendy coffee shop, being their own boss, enjoying more leisure time,...

Seven Bar Jokes Involving Grammar and Punctuation

Thanks to Eric K. Auld... 1. A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves. 2. A dangling modifier walks into a bar. After finishing a drink, the bartender asks it to leave. 3. A question mark walks into a bar? 4. Two quotation marks “walk into” a...

Dialogue Tags

One of the joys of reading short stories or novels is being transported into a different life, a different country, a different perspective. But when an author inadvertently makes his or her presence suddenly known, it’s jolting for the reader to be jerked back into...

WHY WRITERS HIRE EDITORS

It’s clear why writers should use an editor if they’re planning to self-publish a book. If they don’t have their manuscripts edited, their work will be published as is—typos and all. Writers who plan to self-publish can either hire an independent editor, purchase the...

MAKING TIME TO WRITE WHEN YOU HAVE KIDS

Making time to write is hard when you’re a stay-home parent. My own kids are teenagers—busy, busy teenagers with jobs and social lives and cell phones and their own agendas. If I wanted to work on a novel, they’d probably be thrilled to have me out of their hair. But I remember when I first started freelancing. One child was a toddler, the other an infant, and the only way I could work was to get up at four in the morning and hope for a couple of productive hours. The rest of the day was hopeless, but I had those precious two hours each morning.

If you’re a writer with children at home, you can do a certain amount of work each day without stashing your kids at daycare or plopping them in front of the TV (although a half hour of Nick Jr. can be a life-saver). Here are a couple of tips I learned along the way.

First, make your writing career a family decision. Announce your goal to the family, get their input, brainstorm together for ways you can get some writing done each day, and delegate chores if possible. When a child feels they’ve contributed to the plan, they’re much more likely to cooperate.

Take advantage of family, friends, play groups. Would Grandma like a few hours of kid time each week? Can you trade days with a neighbor? Or host a play group one day in your home, and the next week you’re free.

Structure your child’s day. If your kids are home full time, create a schedule and try to stick to it (at least until the next developmental stage comes along). If they know that after breakfast, Mom or Dad is going to sit at the computer while they build a LEGO tower nearby for half an hour (you can use a timer), they are less likely to protest or interrupt.

Kids are also more likely to let you work if you give them your undivided attention first. Set up an activity, sit down with them for 15 minutes, and interact positively; then casually announce, “Great job. You guys finish illustrating your castle stories, and I’ll sit over here and work on my boring old grown-up story.”

Make your work space off limits. Respect your children’s personal spaces, toys, or treasures, and teach them respect for your own space. Remind them that your desk is for work and your computer is not a plaything (except of course for Farmville and Mafia World on Facebook, but they don’t have to know that. Nobody has to know that).

Older kids love to be “in charge.” Make clear chore charts depending on age, and put the kids in charge of picking up toys, sweeping the kitchen, feeding the dog, or watering a few plants.

You’ll have to be realistic. Depending on your kids’ ages, you may only expect to work an hour or two each day. But if you are organized and can provide structure to their days—and if you schedule plenty of quality one-on-one time—the little darlings are more likely to respect your need to write.

An added bonus: With a structured day, your children will do less lolling around, whining about being bored, and when they have free time, they’re more likely to enjoy it—sometimes independently!

2 Comments

  1. Lisa Dale

    Great tips, Reba! I heard Mary Gordon once tell a story about her writing time.

    She’d had an in-house nanny to watch her kids a few hours a day so she could write. She said that one day her young son decided to sit outside her door all day while she wrote. She ignored him to teach him a lesson–that the structure of the day was set. When she opened the door she gathered him up into her arms and he said. “did you know I was sitting here all day?” And she said yes. And the son said “But did you know that I was crying?”

    Holy moly! Talk about killer. The writing life sure can be brutal (especially for friends and family of us writers)!

    It’s a great post–thanks for sharing it!

    Reply
    • Reba

      Lisa, thanks for the great story! I would have caved immediately…and usually did with the slightest sad-eyed look or teary little face, which is probably why I didn’t get much writing done in those days. 🙂

      Reply

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